Grant graduated from preschool on Wednesday. I think the with all the chaos of the end of the school year events and planning it didn’t really leave me with too much time to do any introspective thinking. I found over the weekend these small waves of reflection sort of popping up at random times throughout the day. In some ways he seems like such a little boy still. Can he really be leaving for school ALL DAY in the fall? In other ways I’m completely stopped in my tracks at how much he’s grown. This is a picture of Grant on his first day and last day of preschool at Bellevue Country Day School.
I remember his first day and his nervousness. He is and forever will be an observer first. He sits back, takes in the environment, the people, what is going on, and what his role will be and then decides if he wants to participate. There was a lot of thumb sucking and observing going on that first week. The little boy in the second picture knows his role and is more confident and talks excitedly about kindergarten in the fall (though I still sense a tiny bit of anxiety and I know it will take him to get used to it).
This morning I came home from Zumba and found all 3 of my guys watching Planet Earth. I came in and Grant gave me the run down about snow leopards and how they had to kill other animals to eat them and a load of other little facts. I’m always amazed at how much he picks up and how his mind works. He laid across the couch with his head in my lap, while he carried on watching. I got a little teary remembering 5 years ago sitting in the exact same location with a tiny baby that fit in the crook of my arm while I fed him. I had tons to get down today but lingered there a little longer knowing this moment would be gone in a heartbeat. I was reminded of the ABBA song Time Slipping Through My Fingers.
on to the next chapter…
lyrics
Slipping Through My Fingers lyrics
Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile
I watch her go with a surge of that well-known sadness
And I have to sit down for a while
The feeling that I'm losing her forever
And without really entering her world
I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter
That funny little girl
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sleep in our eyes, her and me at the breakfast table
Barely awake, I let precious time go by
Then when she's gone there's that odd melancholy feeling
And a sense of guilt I cant deny
What happened to the wonderful adventures
The places I had planned for us to go
(slipping through my fingers all the time)
Well, some of that we did but most we didn't
And why I just don't know
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture
And save it from the funny tricks of time
Slipping through my fingers...
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Schoolbag in hand she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile...
